Guess who's in Town?

:)

Five days of electronics-digital-communication-optoelectronics-antenna never killed no one. I'll take the risk. Will be back only after 15th I guess. Five days a year. Sounds almost a fair deal no? May be I should haggle a lil' more.

Corrigendum

Was trying to raise my nose to a height where it was more 'breathable'. Armpits were strategically placed all around me in smelly splendour. Couldn't figure if the bus was really stuck in a traffic snarl or taking its own royal pace to wherever. The heat was blanching. And you could feel the tingling of the tiny streams that treacled down from everywhere.

It was one of those moments when you become truly conscious of your existence. And it struck me suddenly, that you always have a choice.

Whatever comes our way, whatever battle we have raging inside us, we always have a choice. It's the choices that make us who we are, and we can always choose to do what's right.

This realization only makes things harder for me. But I cannot possibly believe in something because it makes things easier. I must know things for what they are. I must.

Face to Face

Was looking for something in my desk when I stumbled upon my diary of 2003. Started flipping through the pages. And suddenly things that had long been nowhere were everywhere. And all the facades fell.

Tears swelled. I too had cheated him. Disregarded his reality. Made myself my own reality. A reality that is easier to use. Easier to live. Formulated theories to make the simple truth seem less apparent.

I swear I could not look him in the eye.

Love in times of Discontinuity

I am not high.


It has been cloudy since the morning. And gusts of wind sweep in surprising me sometimes. Almost. Like little children. Playing around in the puddled streets. So when you walk by looking at the streets you see parts of the earth at times and parts of the sky at others. As if everything has been torn and scattered around and bits of sky are lying around on the ground. Dark grey streets with smudges of a light grey sky.

And it has been raining playfully. Rather furtively, actually! It is one of those afternoons when I get all dreamy-eyed and stuff. Am listening to Nat King Cole. Love the piano notes that flow ever so softly...rising falling with the trumpets.

Made myself one large glass of coffee. Dark black coffee. Was sitting on my bed sipping coffee, listening to Nat King Cole and studying(yes!) Digital Electronics. And I have to admit that despite all my prejudices I cannot but help love the austere beauty of this subject! The continuous discontinuity. Each moment that stands on its own. Apart. Distinctively independent. Move away farther, and you begin to see the breathtakingly beautiful and harmonious pattern that these severely individual moments go on to create.

Loving each moment for what it is. Not trying to look back nor beyond. And still be in perfect harmony with your self. With the other 'you's from all the other moments.

No grey areas. Zero or One. Be or don't be. Love or don't. Cry or don't. No where in between.

I love myself.